Monday, June 2, 2008

'The Man' Tales - After the Concert

Shortly after that incredible concert, Cid started to get headaches. For a man who had never suffered from them before, he didn’t know what to do. His doctor prescribed painkillers and on one of his visits I sent him home with my rubber hot water bottle. I thought some heat on the back of his neck might help ease the muscle tension he was experiencing and also relieve the headache. Somehow I missed his call that evening, but I did get this message on my machine.

“Oh hi Aims, it’s Cid. I just took two Tylenol three and I have the hot water bottle on the back of my neck. I have to tell you – I’ve never used a hot water bottle before, but the smell you get from it is pretty incredible. If only I had a rubber fetish. But I don’t. Love your smile and I love you Aims. Goodnight.”

This was so typical of my Cid. I laughed when I heard the message and I saved it in my phone archives so that I could tease him with it whenever I wanted.

Cid’s headaches continued but they didn’t stop him from biking and hiking. One of his neighbors in the condo started to take an interest in him and they began going out for supper now and then. Cid always called me afterwards to tell me of all the funny things that happened during these ‘dates’ and we would giggle together. Sometimes my heart would suffer that pang of jealousy – but who was I to be experiencing this? I still slept beside D every night and he looked after me every day. I chided myself on being such a fool and gave myself a lecture on letting Cid experience someone – anyone – and to not be jealous but to be his friend. Always.

Cid’s neighbor was Chinese and insisted that she was a good cook. Cid kept telling me that he somehow doubted her culinary sense and I howled with laughter when he left a message about her cooking. The message was hard to understand because Cid was laughing so hard. His laugh is one of those that gets really high and goes on and on and is so surprising in a man. Still – the message he left was about the neighbor bringing over some food and Cid tried giving a piece to one of his cats. The cat ate it and then went and hid. What Cid was calling about was that his cat had just come out from under the bed and puked all over the place. He couldn’t stop laughing and apologized for his bizarre message. I had to save that message too. I couldn’t resist.

As time went on and Cid’s headaches got worse, I insisted that he hound his doctor and get some answers about what was going on. The doctor sent him home with another prescription. Nothing seemed to help and I made Cid go back and demand some kind of action. The doctor finally sent him to a specialist who did some tests and ordered x-rays.

I was home on the day Cid went in to the specialist and got the results.

“Oh hi Aims. It’s Cid.”

“Hi my love!”

“I’ve just come from the specialist.”


“The cancer is back. It’s in my lungs.”


Mima said...

Why oh why do doctors not take things seriously, they really ought to listen when someone thinks that something is wrong, especially as he had already been ill. I just hope that this isn't going the way that I have a very nasty feeling that it's going. Ringing a bit of a bell for me at the moment!

Anonymous said...

Oh, my. Oh, my. I'm speechless, once again. My dad died from lung cancer. Margie

travelling, but not in love said...

Aims, I'm stunned. Poor Cid. Please let this not be heading where I fear it is heading.

How have you survived all of this heartbreak and upset?

Leatherdykeuk said...

Oh! I saw it coming but still! Poor Cid.

bichonpawz said...

Oh. I was so hoping that this was not going to happen. How did you get through all of this aims? You are such an inspiration.

dND said...


How can any doctor ignore long term headaches in someone who's not had them before?

I do so hope this isn't going the way I think it might. Life just isn't fair and just how did you cope.

Deborah x

Anonymous said...

That is terrible! I think we should all form an orderly queue to shin kick this "doctor". Is he the same one who ignored Cid's kidneys?

Momma said...

Poor Cid! Poor you! I lost my dad to lung cancer. It's an ugly disease.

Peace - D

The Lehners in France said...

Oh aims, the same thing happened to my brother, he had bone cancer at 15, leg amputated at 19, then started coughing 5 months later. The doctors said it was a bug going around. I was lung cancer, he died 2 weeks after the diagnosis. I have no faith in general practitioners whatsoever.
Debs x
P.S. Conrats on you award, it's well deserved.

Daryl said...

OOOOOOOOH ... headaches made me think brain tumor .. the trade off is not much better ...


Lane said...

Oh Aims. Poor Cid.

This is not good. Not good at all:-(

Maggie May said...! This blasted disease, yet again .Hope he gets over it. You just have to hope.

Mean Mom said...

Sorry that had to happen to the poor man and also to you. If only the doctor had taken more care.

On a lighter note, congratulations on your win.

aims said...

Mima - Oh dear - Your last sentence made my heart clutch! Grampa?

Margie - I'm so sorry to hear that. I hope I'm not making you relive that.

TBNIL - Actually I don't know. I guess part of it was the reason for the breakdown - but the rest? We all do what we have to do - don't we. We forge ahead and just put ourselves on automatic pilot. It's afterwards - always afterwards....

Leatherdykeuk - Oh Rachel. Thank you!

Bichonpawz - As I said to TBNIL - we do get through things - because we just have to.

Dnd - I could have kicked that doctor right in the nuts for being so uncaring. Isn't caring about a human being one of the reasons why people become doctors in the first place?

Melanie - One and the same. The idiot.

Momma - I'm so sorry to hear that. As I said to Margie - I hope I'm not making your relive some horrible times.

Debs - OMG!! Please! Tell me you sued the bastard! How horrible for your brother - and how horrible for you and all of yours. I am so very sorry my friend.

Daryl - Those kind of headaches always do don't they? What the hell was the doctor thinking about besides what his ass looked like.

Lane - I know you have been cheering for Cid all along. I actually don't have any other words here for you Lane. Sorry.

Maggie - Yes - you are going through something similar at the moment. My thoughts are with you and yours.

Mean Mom - Thank you for your kind words and for the congrats. I'm going to get around to posting about the contest next.

menopausaloldbag (MOB) said...

Ah I feared this development. Secondary cancer - the eventual killer no doubt. I've no wish to jump ahead of your story and write Cid from your life but I've lived with family and friends livig with and dying of cancer. I hope that some form of miracle intervenes. How hard your life was then.

On a sunnnier note - well done on your victory! Well deserved and you must be hopping from foot to foot with excitement! x

Anonymous said...

My heart went into my throat, when I read this. It is so very sad. I lost my father to lung cancer. I so hope this has a happier ending. Such a beautiful person, such an awful disease.

Thank you for your message today. My e-mail, is


lisa marie said...

The words I dread to hear. "The cancer's back" Leave me with a tear.

Anonymous said...

Aims, I read your answering comments and don't worry. I am fine. Congratulations on the best of inspiration blog contest. We've been telling you that you are a WINNER!!! Margie

Nora said...

Damn it Aims, it frustrates me so to hear of so much joy and then to hear such sad news.Cid isn't going to be okay, is he? You are going to lose him and he is not going to be the man. What highways and byways are we going to travel with you?

It seems almost inappropriate, but you won! Congratulations and a well deserved hug from me to you.

A Mother's Place is in the Wrong said...

Hi Aims, have spent the last half hour catching up with your story, and your life! So sorry to hear about Cid - and hope for the best!
I believe congrats are in ordeer too - so sorry I missed the contest and the voting while I was away. Margot xx

Living the Dream said...

Hi aims, Congratualtions on the award, no-one deserves it more. Poor, poor Cid, I was hoping he was going to be the man. Look forward to reading the next post, I think!!

Breezy said...

Poor Cid like many others I feared this was coming. Your writing has brought him so alive for me too!