I didn’t know what to say to that.
My heart broke and I heard it breaking and smashing into my chest wall and crumbling into little pieces as it fell into the pit of my stomach.
The years of our friendship flashed through my brain and I watched it in slow motion – like a mini-film - as it replayed every single experience I had been through with this man.
It slowed down to a frame by frame as it came to the priest who had held my hands and called me a special woman and I watched my feet as they walked towards the bed where this man lay – working at taking each single breath – again and again.
I watched myself lean forward and kiss him – softly – so as not to take away any of the precious air he needed – but still enough to capture the love that lay between us.
I wanted to hold that forever. That love. This man. But I knew – knew that I wouldn’t be able to. I knew that I was losing him. Forever.
All I could say to him was “Oh Cid”.